Have You Ever Thought About Killing Someone?

Egad, what a thought! But apparently we all do this, we have homicidal fantasies, and the majority of these fantasies are sexually related. That is the proposal made by psychologist/professor of experimental psychology at Abilene Christian University in Texas (not Kansas), Dr. Richard Beck. Beck reports that this idea was broached by Dr. David Buss, author of The Murderer Next Door. I find Beck's forthright statements all the more interesting since ACU is a university related to the Churches of Christ.

This connection, which may have, likely has evolutionary connections, raises important questions about who we are as human beings, and the way the church deals with such things.

He makes 4 conclusions:

1. Generally, when we speak of "hate" in the church, we tend think of issues like racism. But the most common forms of hate center on sexual issues. This connection is rarely made in church.

2. This connection of hate and sex needs to be made explicit if spiritual interventions are to be both preventative and effective. I've never heard sexual jealousy or hate of sexual rivals discussed in the church with any degree of frankness. I doubt, therefore, that people are aware of just how vulnerable they are to sexually motivated hate. And this ignorance doesn't allow a person to adequately prepare for temptations. In the end, they are simply hijacked by their feelings.

3. Like with issues of lust, when is a homicidal fantasy a sin? In the moments and days after a hurt these reactions seem natural. To not have ANY reaction would mark you as a robot. The issue is, if the behavior is controlled, how much scope can we give to thoughts? What is natural/normal and what is sinful?

4. Finally, the human animal is way more sexual than we realize. There is some conversation about sex in churches but it is generally about the act of intercourse. What we are missing is how sexualized an animal we truly are, how sex affects our relations with peers (e.g., sexual rivals) and our self-identity. Sex permeates life more than we realize, affecting things like who we hate and who we would like to kill. And I think it would be helpful if the church had more conversations about these dynamics, about those dark places in our minds, a little more often.
Yes, we in the church have much to consider, and it's too our detriment that we continually sweep difficult issues under the rug. For too long I did that - usually in the interest of keeping my job -- but our ability to live together requires that we take the next step. So, take a look at this post from Dr. Beck and see what you think.

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