Judaism Is About Love: Recovering the Heart of Jewish Life (Rabbi Shai Held) - A Review

JUDAISM IS ABOUT LOVE: Recovering the Heart of Jewish Life. By Shai Held. New York, NY: Farrar, Strauss and Giroux, 2024. 546 pages.

Judaism is focused on law, not love, correct? That’s what many Christians believe, but, apparently, that is also what many Jews believe. That is, many believe that love is a Christian idea, not a Jewish one. Is not Judaism a religion of law? Many Christians do believe that Jesus offered something that Judaism lacked. That something is love and grace. It’s a point that Marcion made clear when he suggested that the God of the Jews and the God of Jesus were different gods. Paul could indeed at times leave the impression that Jesus a new and improved version of religious life focused on love in place of a Jewish emphasis on law. But what if both Christians and many Jews have gotten things wrong? What if the heart of Judaism is love? Interestingly, many Jews believe that Judaism is a religion of law and not love. But what if that isn't true? What if love is the heart of Jewish life? That is the message that Rabbi Shai Held delivers to us in his book Judaism Is About Love.

Rabbi Held is the president and dean of the Hadar Institute in New York City. He has written several books including this one which I think we can call a major tome that should change the conversation within Judaism and between Jews and Christians. Judaism Is About Love has its origins in conversations Held had with students years ago that concerned the relationship of love to Judaism. When he suggested that Judaism is "built on the idea that God loves us and beckons us to love God back," the students objected, suggesting that this sounded like Christianity. (p. 3). This book is a response to that sentiment. It's not that Christianity does not affirm the centrality of love, but to say that Christianity emphasizes love is not to deny that the same could be true of Judaism. What Held makes clear up front is that while these two religions of love have much in common, Judaism isn’t Christianity.  There are significant theological differences that shouldn’t be papered over. So, what Rabbi Held does here is offer a distinctive Jewish of love, though he often engages Christian scholars in conversation. 

As a reviewer of Judaism Is About Love, I acknowledge that I read it from a Christian perspective. From that vantage point, I also acknowledge that Jesus’ view of love, which is expressed in the Gospels, is deeply rooted in Judaism. Therefore, the Christian perspective on love has its roots in Judaism. That being said, over time the theological understandings of both traditions have developed their own interpretations and understandings of those foundational elements. For me as a Christian, however, I am deeply interested in what Jewish thinkers have to say about matters of faith and life. I believe that in reading this book my understanding of love has been deepened significantly.

Rabbi Held notes that one reason why many Jews misunderstand Jewish understandings of love and grace is that Jewish theology also emphasizes the centrality of concrete action. What he seeks to do here is reclaim and recover the interrelationship of emotion and action. He writes that he aims in this book to "tell the story of Jewish theology, ethics, and spirituality through the lens of love, and therefore to restore the heart—in both senses of the word—of Judaism to its rightful place" (p. 6). For example, he wants the reader to understand that the Jewish commitment to justice is rooted in love. In his view, love is both emotion and action. By understanding the relationship of emotion and action, he helps Jewish readers better understand the role love plays in Judaism, but can also help Christians, who are, he acknowledges, a secondary audience of the book, to understand the relationship between emotion and action.

Rabbi Held divides his book into four parts, each of which describes and develops a Jewish theology of love. He begins in Part I, which is titled "The Self Facing a Loving God," with three foundational chapters. In Chapter 1, titled "We Are Loved," he roots the human ability to love in God's love for God's people. He writes that one does not earn God's love, but it is something one should strive to live up to. Thus, he offers what he believes is a "good definition of Judaism's vision of the spiritual life: the attempt to live up to God's love." (p. 23). He emphasizes the premise that for Judaism, humans matter to God. With that foundation laid, he turns in Chapter 2 to a discussion of “The Gifts of God Flow Through You." Here he connects love with grace, such that while we do not earn God's love, for it is a gift of grace, this love does not stop with us. It flows through us to others through generosity and kindness. While a life rooted in love should express gratitude, it can also involve protest, as described in Chapter 3, which is titled "Sacred Indignation." He writes that love as “sacred indignation” is a posture that we see exhibited in the lives of Abraham and Moses, both of whom protest to God. The same is true of the Psalmists. He writes that an honest religious life requires both gratitude to God and a willingness to protest. However, we must also acknowledge that protest comes with risk. He writes that “protest can be a compelling practice, but when it hardens into a full-blown ‘theology of protest,’ it can render faith incoherent, or destructive, or both. What grounds theological protest and gives it life and coherence is precisely faith in God’s love and ultimate goodness” (p. 75).

Part II, titled "Widening Circles: Whom Should We Love," is made up of six chapters. Each of these chapters describes how God's love and human love are expressed. Chapter 4 focuses on the family as the place where we are both loved and learn to love. That leads in Chapter 5, to a discussion of "Loving Our Neighbor," which is subtitled "Judaism's 'Great Principle' but What Does It Mean?" For Christians, this is the second great commandment instituted by Jesus, but rooted in the Book of Leviticus. This chapter is of great importance not only for Jews but also Christians, because it gives us a distinctively Jewish interpretation of that command. Rabbi Held addresses the question of whether love can be commanded, especially if we understand love to be an emotion. He discusses the options present in Jewish thought, including the question that many Christians wrestle with, and that is the identity of the neighbor. Held suggests that for Judaism in general, the neighbor is not a stranger. He points out that in Judaism there is another command that speaks to one’s relationship with the stranger. Therefore, he understands this command to speak to the relationships Jews have with other Jews. Therefore, he raises the question of the difference between the particular and the universal. It is a question that will continue to pop up in the book.  Therefore, when we turn to Chapter 6, which is titled "Loving Our Own, and Everyone Else Too," he addresses "Judaism's Particularist Universalism," which involves a series of concentric circles that describe the ways Jews think about what is owed to the other. This discussion is, I believe, quite illuminating because it serves to help us prioritize our lives. If loving one's neighbor has a particularist dimension, then what about the other? Held addresses "Judaism's Other 'Great Principle'" in Chapter 7, which is titled "Human Dignity and Solidarity." Here he makes a distinction between love and respect, with both being positive obligations. This is where the concentric circles come into play. It is a question that is asked again in Chapter 8, which is titled "Loving the Stanger." When it comes to this area of concern, he notes that for Jews, the answer to the question of how one loves a stranger is rooted in memory. That is because Jews were once strangers in a strange land. Therefore, Jews are called to love their neighbor and strangers though in different ways. Finally, we come to the question of whether one can love one’s enemies (Chapter 9). This is where many Christians have drawn a line, suggesting that while Judaism does teach that love is due to one’s neighbor, Jesus goes further by calling for his followers to love their enemies. While Rabbi Held acknowledges that this is a delicate issue, especially for Jews who have suffered at the hands of Christians through the centuries, he suggests that it’s not fair to make a clear distinction between Judaism and Jesus when it comes to loving one’s enemies. He writes that there may not be a clear ethical argument against hating another person, but there is a theological one: "If human beings—even awful, murderous ones—are created in God's image, then perhaps we are forbidden—for religious reasons—from hating them. If we love God, we cannot hate what God has made." He's not certain about this, but it's worth contemplating (p. 221).

We turn in Part III to the biblical concept of hesed from a Jewish perspective. He titles the section “Bringing God's Love to Other People." This section of the book has three chapters, each of which dives deeply into the concept of hesed, a word that many of us, including Christians, have adopted. He begins this discussion with a chapter (10) on "Imitating God." To love (hesed) is to walk in God's way. First, he defines hesed as love manifested in acts of kindness. That is "an internal state concretely expressed in external action." (p. 228). This goes beyond being a good person. While acting with kindness is not uniquely Jewish, it is authentically Jewish. Building on this chapter we move to "Love in the Ruins" (chapter 11). Here he describes how one responds to evil and suffering, and whether we "help God bring love and compassion to places of darkness and affliction." (p. 254). The third chapter in this section is titled "Waiting for God" (Chapter 12). Here he invites us to ponder the fact that God's presence is not yet fully manifest in the world. There is a chasm between the confession that God loves us and the realities of life. Thus, "to live in the chasm, to wait for God, is to catch glimpses, to create glimpses, of a world in which human dignity is real and the presence of God is manifest." (p. 261).

Part IV is titled "Theology of a Loving God." Here we reach the apex of Rabbi Held's argument. We have explored the many dimensions of a Jewish understanding of love and therefore Held’s belief that Judaism is a religion of love. In the chapters we encounter in Part IV,  he brings together a specific Jewish theology of love. He breaks the discussion of his theology of God’s love into three chapters. The first of the three chapters is titled "The God of Judaism (and of the 'Old Testament') Is a God of love" (chapter 13). Here Held explores what it means to say that God is love. He answers the question by declaring "What makes God God, in other words, is the depth, steadfastness, and extent of God's love." He roots this theology in Scripture—focusing especially on Isaiah and Hosea. As he explores the question of what makes God God, he addresses important questions such as biblical descriptions of God's wrath and judgment. He acknowledges the tension here, a tension that many Christians struggle with. As described here, "God's love can, ultimately necessitate God's judgment. God's judgment can ultimately flow from God's love." (p. 283). In all, I found Rabbi Held’s discussion of divine anger and even violence to be very helpful. Ultimately, he writes that Judaism tells us of a God of love who summons us to lead lives of love; we are called both to feel love and act lovingly" (p. 307). When we turn to Chapter 14, we find Rabbi Held addressing another area of concern to many, and that is the issue of chosenness. Held helpfully describes both what chosenness involves and what it doesn't. He addresses God's special love for Israel, noting that it is an act of grace and is not simply being chosen for a purpose/vocation. He also addresses the question of whether God is indifferent to the non-elect. That is, if God loves Israel does that mean God doesn't love anyone else? He demonstrates that God also chooses others, but differently. Finally, in Chapter 15, he speaks of "Loving a Loving God." If God loves Israel, then how might Israel respond? Here he discusses, among other things, Jewish obedience to the commandments. It is done out of love for God. The commandments are not oppressive but are descriptive of ways to show love to God. But this love is not just one of actions, it is also emotional. It is an expression of intimacy with God. To love God is to love with God. That means loving what God loves. That includes creation. It also involves becoming God's hands— thus we see it in loving the stranger.

In his conclusion to Judaism Is About Love, Rabbi Held writes not only of God's faithfulness but also God's faith in humanity. He writes here a word I find to be very comforting and empowering: "God knows who we are—knows of the cruelty and callousness of which we are capable; knows how trapped many of us are within the prisons of our own egos; knows how far we often stray from the divine ideals of love and compassion and the pursuit of justice—and yet, in the face of all that, God believes in us. God believes in our capacity for love" (p. 376). That is a powerful word. In fact, I would add that it is a beautiful word. It is a word that is definitely needed at this moment in history. This may be a discussion directed specifically at Jews who may not have understood how central love is to Jewish identity and theology, but what he shares in this book is not only insightful but at points inspiring, even for one who is not a Jew.

Rabbi Shai Held’s Judaism Is About Love may serve as a reminder to Jews that Judaism is about love, but it’s a reminder to all of us of the importance of love not just to religion but to human life. As a Christian reading this book, I found it to be a powerful call to embrace God’s love and then pass it on to others. Love may be an emotion, but it is also an action. Therefore, I highly recommend this book to all who believe that God is love and that we who are God’s people should respond by loving others, even if there are concentric circles of love.